"I'll buy myself a battleship just to go fishing...
I'll get myself matching monster trucks,
and when I get a burger, it'll be deluxe...
Then I'll buy myself a Caddy; it'll be humungus
(and finally get a doctor to look at this fungus)...
Gonna buy myself one of those big machines
that Sigorney Weaver used to kill the alien queens!"
I'll get myself matching monster trucks,
and when I get a burger, it'll be deluxe...
Then I'll buy myself a Caddy; it'll be humungus
(and finally get a doctor to look at this fungus)...
Gonna buy myself one of those big machines
that Sigorney Weaver used to kill the alien queens!"
Instead of this cool stuff, I used 20% of my "Economic Stimulus Package" to support Barack Obama. That is the most "stimulating" thing I can do for the economy, and it stimulated my own hopes too!
Maybe they should send their $600 stimulus package to Barack instead of all these crazy shenanigans?
"I used to think Bush was the worst we ever had,
but with all this cash it's hard to stay mad!
There was Katrina and G'itmo and Abu Grahib,
but with $600 I could probably get laid!"
. . .
but with all this cash it's hard to stay mad!
There was Katrina and G'itmo and Abu Grahib,
but with $600 I could probably get laid!"
. . .
"The idea is for the ECONOMY to be stimulated!"
How will Barack Obama Stimulate the Economy?
Click here to learn more about Barack Obama's plan to strengthen the economy when he is elected President (and you can download "Keeping America's Promise: Strengthening the Middle Class). Click here for Obama's speech on "Our Common Stake in America's Prosperity". How will Barack Obama Stimulate the Economy?
Obama's plan for the economy rests upon reversing the attack on the middle class: He plans to offer tax relief to working families and seniors through innovative and modern methods. Click here to download "Keeping America's Promise: Strengthening the Middle Class."
Obama will cut income taxes by $1,000 for working families to offset the payroll tax they pay.
- Provide a Tax Cut for Working Families: Obama will restore fairness to the tax code and through a "Making Work Pay" tax credit of up to $500 per person, or $1,000 per working family. The "Making Work Pay" tax credit will completely eliminate income taxes for 10 million Americans.
- Eliminate Income Taxes for Seniors Making Less than $50,000: This proposal will eliminate income taxes for 7 million seniors and provide these seniors with an average savings of $1,400 each year. Under the Obama plan, 27 million American seniors will also not need to file an income tax return.
- Simplify Tax Filings for Middle Class Americans: Obama will dramatically simplify tax filings so that millions of Americans will be able to do their taxes in less than five minutes. Experts estimate that the Obama proposal will save Americans up to 200 million total hours of work and aggravation and up to $2 billion in tax preparer fees.
Here is an article about Obama's tax plan vs. John McCain't's and an analysis of each candidate's plan by the Tax Policy Center (Urban Institute & Brookings Institution).
Some highlights from Obama's plan to Jumpstart the Economy:
Provide Additional Tax Rebates to American Workers: We need to enact another round of immediate tax relief, $300 per family, to help maintain consumer spending, strengthen the economy and ease the squeeze so many Americans are currently experiencing. Stimulus: $20 billion.
Establish Foreclosure Prevention Fund: Given the downturn in the economy, Obama is calling for immediate creation of his Foreclosure Prevention Fund that will dramatically increase emergency pre-foreclosure counseling, and will help families facing foreclosure to responsibly refinance their mortgages or sell their homes.... It is meant to help responsible homeowners through this difficult period. Stimulus: $10 billion.
Provide Relief for State and Local Governments Hardest-Hit by the Housing Crisis to Prevent Cuts in Vital Services: Because of the housing crisis and the weakening economy, many state and local governments are facing significant revenue shortfalls... In the areas hardest-hit by the housing crisis we should provide immediate, temporary funding ... so that the decline in property values does not cause them to slash critical public services and cut vital infrastructure spending. Stimulus: $10 billion.
Extend and Expand Unemployment Insurance: Barack Obama believes we must extend and strengthen the Unemployment Insurance program to address the needs of the long-term unemployed, who currently make up nearly one-fifth of the unemployed .... Every dollar invested in Unemployment Insurance benefits results in $1.73 in economic output. Stimulus: $10 billion.
"Ooh I'm so stimulated!"
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